Confessions of a Drama Mama

The theme for Jillene’s 21st birthday party was ‘retro’. We asked what period of retro she wanted and she said ‘just retro la’. OK, so that was a bit ambiguous - Should we go as characters from That 70s Show or as John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever? Didn’t matter, we were excited anyway. Gave us an opportunity to act young again.

So we trotted off to No 1 Costume Costume at Aliwal Street (it’s number 32 Aliwal Street if any of you want to go). The shop was crowded with a capital c. It didn’t occur to us maybe not everyone there was invited to Jillene’s birthday party; maybe they were just looking for a costume for halloween.

Anyway after a couple of skirts that were too tight (me) and a leather jacket that was too short (Max), we left with our haul and $80 poorer. We arrived in style with our wigs and our ultra tight (him) and ultra short  (me) get up but to our horror, everyone else didn’t really take the theme seriously. The guys were in their normal everyday clothes and the girls threw on stuff they bought from Topshop.

I think if this were 10 years ago and I got invited to a party like this, if I didn’t go dressed up in costume, I might have been the only one out. But times have changed.

In any case, I’m glad we were so sporting. I’m glad I didn’t have to use my everyday retro dress, hairband and necklace beads. Heck, that’d just be a normal day at work for me!

If we really had charged $5 for every photo taken of us, we could have paid off our costume rentals I’m sure. Anyway, it was all done in the name of fun, and I think Jillene really did an excellent job planning everything

On a final note, you know you’re getting old when there’s a stripper at your kid sister’s birthday party instead of clowns and magicians.

I hardly dreamt last night cos I kept waking up in the middle of the night because of the neighbour’s coughing and loud throat clearing KA PTUI sounds. That’s really terrible, and definitely one of the things I won’t miss about Ghim Moh Road.

But on most other nights I’ve been dreaming alot. Dreams about things that happened in my childhood. Things that I’ve totally forgotten about. Like performing during recess time plays (where we’d drag the canteen benches to the basket ball court so that our audience could sit and watch. We even charged admission. But mostly, we hardly had the time to perform since we spent so much time carrying the benches). And in these dreams, I see people as they were at that age! Like Julia, Loretta and Mabel at age 7!

Someone said that maybe I know I’m going to leave Singapore and that’s why my brain subconsciously tries to remember every single thing that has happened to me here. But me being me, I can’t help but wonder…. maybe I’m going to die soon that’s why my whole life is flashing in front of my eyes in slow mo, in nightly episodes :S

i It’s ironic because during lunch, we were just talking about schools (cos some guys said that SJI would now include girls, and they were planning on petitioning) and I said I would like to send my daughter (my future daughter, yes) to a convent. Like a school, not to be a nun.

Without trying to sound 1. rude, 2. snobbish or 3. proud, I really enjoyed my 10 years in KC and I  somehow feel that the education I got in that environment was much better than any given (sorry, I apologise first, SORRY!) neighbourhood school.

I remember us having to thank each teacher for her (we only had maybe 4 male teachers?) time after each class. "Thank you and God bless you Ms/Mrs/Mr ______". It may seem silly then but I think it’s one of the little things that makes us different somehow. Now I wonder if we also said it to Mr Yamin. Anyone remembers?

I never looked down on a neighbourhood school, but let’s just say that I know deep down that I would not want to send my kids to one. Let’s face it. Us convent bitches all think that we’re elite to a certain extent. Let’s not try to deny it. But today, I was truly truly humbled.

I always end up in jobs that require me to do things that none of my friends do. Today I had to visit a primary school to listen to a kids choir. Being in the choir room with a group of 8-12 year olds brought me back to the times when I was part of the primary school choir and how much fun I had practicing for carolling (where Mabel Lee peed on Tryphena’s auntie’s porch).

But these kids were good ok. Watching them sing was an amazing experience. They were PROFESSIONAL ok. They had professional outfits, they pursed their lips, their teacher gave them stares for crossing their legs…. We didn’t even have all that! Mrs Ortega never pressured us like that. And come to think of it, I think we weren’t all that good also la. We never really won anything, I think.

But anyhow, that short 10 minute session made me change my thinking. A neighbourhood school is as good as any other. And maybe because the public perception is swayed in the opposite direction, many schools have felt challenged to prove us all wrong. I must say they’re doing a great job.

But me being me, I’d still like for my daughter to go to a convent school. I’d like for her to know her teachers by name and not simply "cher". And for that, I am not going to apologise

Dear Indonesian forest burners,

Max says that you are burning your forests for economic reasons, not cos you suka suka want to burn forests to cause us distress. OK, so that doesn’t make you as bad as many people perceive you to be. You’re just making a living after all, right?

But really, is burning the only way? And if it is, can I suggest that maybe you burn them during different times of the year, so that we won’t always be at the receiving end of your smoke?

Cos now it looks like Genting, except that we feel very cheated cos we only get the blurness of vision without the cool air.

And while you take your time to consider my humble request, do you mind if I submit my petty cash claim to you?

Aircon - How to open windows in the house? What ventilation? So it’s got to be aircon every night now. Dunno how much yet, but I’ll write to you again after I get my SP Power bill at the end of the month

Medical claim - so far I haven’t seen the doctor yet but Max and I have both been headachy and sinus-y. Do you think you could give us a medical allowance of some sort?

Eye drops - Yeah my eyes have been quite red and dry of late. But I look like a fool with my glasses so I’ll have to stick with my contact lenses. Special eye drops for contact lenses are about $8

Liang teh - Depending on my mood, I may cook it or buy it. If I buy, luo han guo is $2 per bottle. I think I’ve had maybe 4 bottles so far, and probably 4 more per week that you intend to continue burning. Oh but if I cook it then I guess I’d need 4 balls per week and water, and rock sugar.

Some time I ago I wrote about how I couldn’t stand people mispronouncing my name. But am I the chosen one to have a name for all to mispronounce? Oh I should be so lucky.

A while ago I bumped into a lady with a baby and I asked what his name was. She said "Jack". I don’t remember what I said but it promopted her to spell it. She said "Jack la. Zhed-eh-see-kay, Jack". Oh. Zack.

I’ve realised that there are some other names that are commonly mispronounced. Still fairly forgiveable if it’s by a third party, but very much frowned upon if it’s one’s own name. I’ve taken the liberty to thinnk of names that are often not pronouced the way they are intended to (not including people calling Max "Matt" / "Mack"):

RACHEL: Often pronounced as "Ray-cher". Where did the L go?
Same thing for MICHAEL

DANIEL: Sometimes referred to as "Dan-neo"

MARK: Usually these guys are just known as "Muk"

LAWRENCE: For some reason, otherwise known as "Law-len"

COLIN: Colins get called "Coh-leen"

I once had a colleague called LOIS, only she pronounced it as "Loo-is" And when we met a client by the same name, the client introduced herself as "Loys". Oh goodness.

Another one. An acquintance whose name is pronounced as JULIE but spelt as JULY. O…..K…..

I have a strange strange feeling that the culprits are the same people who call a heart a ‘love’, and would call a sausage a ‘hot dog’. The same people who say "my phone numbel is…". I don’t get it. Where is the L in "number"? If it’s LUMBER, I can understand. But numbel? … Huh?

To be continued..

I remember always being afraid of bus drivers. This started way back when I used to pay 25 cents for bus fare. If I had the non air-con bus stamp, I’d have to drop 10 cents for an air-con bus. I got scolded once for putting 2 five-cent coins. Damn walau right?

I belong to an era where bus drivers would see you running through their side mirror and speed off anyway. Which is why my experience over the past 24 hours was so confusing.

Case 1. Yesterday. Bus number 33

A youngish bus driver was actually greeting and smiling at passengers as they boarded the bus. I gave him a tentative smile back. But I sat in the front (very auntie) and I noticed that nobody smiled back at him. Nobody returned his greeting.

Case 2. Today. Bus number 100

The bus was a bit faulty and he couldn’t get the doors to open. When he finally did, he apologised profusely. Some people had decided they didn’t want to wait and he got off his seat, and stood at the steps to call the people from the bus stop, assuring them that the bus was back in working order.

What has happened to the world of bus drivers? Did they go through some kind of up your-service-training or something? Whatever they’re doing, I think it’s working. Thumbs up, Uncle Bus Captains. You’re really doing SBS proud. Now it’s time to train Singaporeans to appreciate you.

"Hello, I’m Anna".

Those were the first words I heard in the voice of Anna Efverlund, Designer of IKEA products.

I had the honour of meeting her on an IKEA press trip to Sweden and I was in awe when she walked into the room. Not that I had a crush on her or anything. But come on, this is someone who’s designed many many things for IKEA. This is someone whose work you see on shelves, someone whose work you probably have in your homes.

I don’t know how to equate Anna’s status. I wouldn’t say it’s like meeting an MP or the president. But it’s the same kind of feeling. You feel tongue tied, you feel like you should say something but you don’t want to risk sound stupid. So you end up just smiling and still succeed in looking stupid. So she did her presentation and she told her stories and she joined us for dinner after (she was a barrel of laughs!) but the strange thing is that I don’t really remember much of the other stuff she said. Not that they weren’t important, but they didn’t leave as much an impression as those 3 simple words.

That was all it took to truly make me believe that IKEA isn’t just talk. That if it believes in being down to earth and simple, it’s not just one person, one store, one country talking, but all 104,000 IKEA co-workers worldwide. I mean, I’ve always kinds believed in it. It’s my job to believe in it. It’s part of the package. But it’s funny how amongst all the press releases, articles, manuals and guidelines there are available, ultimately it’s 3 simple words that make that point so strong.

And here I am, with Anna: